I love this. I have several friends who knew her, so I’ve seen quite a few photos of her from more recent times. But what strikes me most reading this is how much I hate photos of myself that show my age. I do not want to judge myself for aging and do anyway.
This internalization of something so brutal in our culture doesn’t make me happy. It’s a running theme in my life.
I totally get that. We see all that joy and self-containment and… mischief… and still we’d swap it for that sad, thin, ill version of ourselves. (Speaking for myself, until very recently.)
I think for me it’s such frustration at HOW LONG this theme has played out. I was rebelling against the demand that I be thin since I was nine years old, and put these same demands on myself fifty years later. It’s ridiculous.
Such a good point, Sam. It was on my mind, too, reading/seeing Marianne Faithfull's obituaries.
In "ordinary" life, I've been sifting through photos of my mother-in-law ahead of her funeral. We've prepared a little booklet of photos and reminiscences to commemorate her life and wanted to show every age up to when she died at 86, not just her youthful beauty.
I love this. I have several friends who knew her, so I’ve seen quite a few photos of her from more recent times. But what strikes me most reading this is how much I hate photos of myself that show my age. I do not want to judge myself for aging and do anyway.
This internalization of something so brutal in our culture doesn’t make me happy. It’s a running theme in my life.
Thanks for writing such a great piece.
I totally get that. We see all that joy and self-containment and… mischief… and still we’d swap it for that sad, thin, ill version of ourselves. (Speaking for myself, until very recently.)
I think for me it’s such frustration at HOW LONG this theme has played out. I was rebelling against the demand that I be thin since I was nine years old, and put these same demands on myself fifty years later. It’s ridiculous.
I love this post Sam. A truly great picture of her, glowing from the inside out.
How much happier does she look? (How much more… gleeful… do most of them Look.)
Such a good point, Sam. It was on my mind, too, reading/seeing Marianne Faithfull's obituaries.
In "ordinary" life, I've been sifting through photos of my mother-in-law ahead of her funeral. We've prepared a little booklet of photos and reminiscences to commemorate her life and wanted to show every age up to when she died at 86, not just her youthful beauty.
I wonder how many of the photo editors are men and how old they are?? And what about make figures you die later in life...here I go down the 🐇 hole...
in my experience the pic editors are a real mix of ages and genders. I started looking at male stars and the pics tended to be much more balanced...
Still angry that women are judged differently than men in most professions. Harsher, physically, intellectually, emotionally. Grrr.
So bloody true. What a great piece, although a shame it had to be written at all.